Yet, a true man can only be supported by a true woman. And guess what? The head of the woman is the man. My daughter and I were in a group of women recently when one said, "My Momma always used to say, 'The head of the house is the man, but the woman is the neck and she can turn that head whatever way she wants." A lot of the women laughed. You know who says such things (and who laughs at such things)? Rebellious women.
The heart of a true woman is not to submit to her husband in name only, pretending he is the head while really getting him to do what she wants him to do. Rebellion in disguise is still rebellion; and rebellion is still as the sin of witchcraft (I Samuel 15:23).
What I am sharing today might be considered a small thing, but even the little foxes can spoil the vine. God wants to see our faithfulness, even in the small things...and sometimes those are the toughest.
I had once shared what I thought was a great idea with my husband. Although I thought that this suggestion might be an answer to prayer, my husband did not see the same potential. We talked about it and I made my case, but he was just not moved by it. "Okay", I said, "I will not mention it again." There set in the struggle.
As time passed and he didn't act on my suggestion, I kept wanting to remind him of this option. Each time I got the thought to say something, I remembered my words. And each time I remembered my words, God would remind me of I Corinthians 11:3. "Do you really believe that the head of your husband is Christ? If so, then why do you feel compelled to influence his decision in this matter? Do you think that I am unable to lead Him where I want him to go?"
See, it would never be a problem for me to share my thoughts with my husband or even for me to remind him of something helpful. A wise man will consider the input of his wife because she has been given specifically as a help for him (Genesis 2-18-24; 21:12). The issue comes in trying to get him to do what "I" think is right. The problem creeps in when we try to be his head, even with just our suggestions. Even with our words, we can wear others down.
"A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike." Proverbs 27:15
How do I know this was a problem? Because I literally had to bite my tongue to stay quiet. I had to fight with myself not to bring the topic back up, letting me know the urge was inordinate. Why am I writing about this? Because I am on a mission to rid myself of every vestige of anything that might displease God. Aren't we all? :-)
This is important because my relationship with my husband reflects how I relate to God. People (men and women) often bring this "neck" thinking to God, supposing that they can run a game on Him. They will - with their prayers, petitions, or persistence - get God to do their will instead of His own. It will never happen.
|Don't buy into a worldly mindset. Be a help to your husband |
& your household, not a hindrance.
"For it was thus that the pious women of old who hoped in God were accustomed to beautify themselves and were submissive to their husbands, adapting themselves to them as themselves secondary and dependent upon them. It was thus that Sarah obeyed Abraham, following his guidance and acknowledging his headship over her by calling him lord (master, leader, authority). And you are now her true daughters if you do right and let nothing terrify you, not giving way to hysterical fears or letting anxieties unnerve you." I Peter 3:5-6
Sisters, sometimes the hardest thing for a woman to do is to be at peace. God has really been working with me recently to be "anxious for nothing" (Philippians 4:6). I encourage you to rest in Christ always. Don't buy into the rebellious mindset that you are supposed to "turn the head". And even if you don't believe in such a perspective, keep guard over your heart to ensure that your actions are in line with your heart.
"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1