Friday, February 3, 2012


Calling All Women

I was reflecting on some comments this morning regarding the desperate need for men to take their God-assigned place as leaders in the home & church.  In discussing this topic, it is not uncommon to hear folks (particularly women) say something like, "If only the men would stand up and take their place."

Yet as I was dropping off the kids this morning, God reminded me that the word Eve means "life".  In fact, women were designed by God to be a life-giving force to those around them.

"So," God said, "If there is death in the church, maybe it is because the women are not in their place?" Now you know I almost had to pull off on the side of the road for that one!  LOL

The point is not to place blame, and neither is that why God brought this to my attention.  The bottom line is that everyone needs to do what God has purposed us to do.  There is no such thing as sitting around and waiting for someone else to get it right.  We each need to be about the Father's business.

To be honest, many women who talk about how "men aren't doing what they are supposed to do" are simply using that as an excuse to justify their own rebellion.  When I used to pray for my husband to be saved, God would immediately counter with, "But are you prepared to submit to him when I do?"  Of course I would quickly answer, "Yes, Lord."; although honestly I was becoming quite frustrated with His continuing to question me in that area.

But God knew my heart...even more than I was willing to know it.  He knew that I needed to be worked on internally in order to be a woman who could support a Godly man.  God had to wash away all of that, "strong, independent woman" craziness that my upbringing and my education had instilled in me.  He had to eradicate the subconscious fear, resentment, and distrust of men which permeated my interactions with them due to a lack of experiencing true manhood in my life.  He had to deal with that spirit of Jezebel who was a witch & a whore, desiring to use manipulation and even sex to control a man and get him to do my bidding.

Yal, and be reminded here, I am talking about a woman who was SAVED!  Some might say, "Well, that was just YOU."  However, I would beg to differ.  Bring up a woman's call to submit to her husband in almost any arena and you will be sure to see sparks fly.  If they don't start trying to explain away that command, they will start pointing out how the men are not doing what they are supposed to.  Anything but deal honestly with the issue at hand.

Let's be real, please?  Many women, including "Christian" women, have no idea what it means to be a woman and are not interested in being one!  Deep down inside, they do not want men to take a God-ordained place of leadership in the home or church because they don't want or know how to submit to it.  They don't want to stop being the "Queen Bee."

However, as I continued to reflect on God's words this morning, He reminded me of Queen Esther.  The first time I read the Book of Esther, I felt that this was my personal story.  Something about Esther just spoke to me and this book gained a special place in my heart (hence the underlying Scripture for this blog).

As I read through the Book of Esther on Monday, God kept bringing my attention back to Esther's Hebrew name: Hadassah (which means myrtle).   I could not understand at the time why this was important, but after the conversations this morning about men, now I understand.

Myrtle is used in Zechariah as a type of God's people in a lowly and depressed state having experienced the oppression of Babylon (Zechariah 1:8-17).  In the midst of the myrtle stands a picture of Jesus Christ, interceding for His people and preparing to bring forth mercy & deliverance as He ushers in His everlasting dominion.  This is also a picture of the end time church, which too has been oppressed in spiritual Babylon.

In Esther (Hadassah), we see a beautiful example of womanhood, but we also see a true woman's response to demonic attacks against God's people: Intercession.  When Satan (through Haman) determined to kill off the Jews, Esther called a fast. She sought - at the potential expense of her own life - to intercede for her people; to fast & pray for God to raise up deliverance on their behalf.   Remember too that Esther's husband was not a Jew; he did not serve God.  Yet, Esther knew that God was powerful enough to touch even the coldest heart and soften it.

Women with a heart after God will not complain about what their husbands - or men in general - are not doing.  They will be driven into prayer and fasting before the Lord so that the men will be given the strength & will to fight.

And what happens when Esther fasts and intercedes before the King?  A decree comes forth for Haman's plan to be overturned.  Instead of being the victim of his evil schemes, God's people are now equipped & commanded to take avenge themselves against every adversary.  Like in Zechariah, once these intercessions come forth, the people prosper as the Lord comforts His elect once more and gathers them again unto Himself (Zechariah 1:17).

How many women are going before the King, interceding for God's mercy & deliverance to be poured out on in the church?  When tempted to murmur against men, who instead will lift up a prayer on their behalf?  Who is willing to humble themselves, seeking God to be molded into a virtuous woman, regardless of what a man is or is not doing?

I sincerely believe that if more women would take seriously their calling to be what God has designed us to be, we will begin to see great revival (life) in the church again.  This is not about making men beyond reproach or lifting them up on some pedestal; it is about women deciding to be and do what God has called for us to be and do...and trusting God to take care of the rest.

In the following message by Pastor Zac Poonen, he discusses the responsibilities of both the husband and wife in marriage.  While it is a good message, I include it here specifically because he also touches on how our blaming each other instead of each taking our own proper roles will result in us missing out on what God has ordained for us: Responsibilities of a Husband and Wife.


  1. Now I need to get off of this computer, but you have certainly spoken my heart this morning! This is exactly what God has placed in my heart: To shout from the rooftops to women that we need to get in our place!! When I began to do this the enemy attacked me from all fronts! He waged a war in my mind, telling me I was crazy or going to be crazy, he brought fear in and I halted for a bit about this subject. I knew that this assignment was from Christ because I too was a rebellious woman and surely had the spirit of Jezebel operating in me. I manipulated men left and right to get what I wanted and when I got married and got saved it was still there. I would try and manipulate my husband through sex, derogatory words, etc... I was a total MESS!! I would belittle him because I had more education, etc... I am telling you the spirit of this world is REAL HELL and just plain EVIL!!

    Then God placed His spirit in me and all of a sudden I had a strong desire to submit to my husband. I actually begin to pray for my husband that he would lead and that I would support him in his role. I am telling you, nobody but God can do what was done to me. From a stubborn, rebellious, manipulating, tyrant to a woman who consults and seeks the blessing of her husband before she dashes off on her own accord.The work is far from complete in me, but I do not that what God has started He will finish! Amen!!

    God is calling ALL women to become like Esther and intercede for our men! I will begin a thorough study in that book today! I'm getting off this computer NOW!! LOL!!

    Much Love Sis!!

  2. Wow funny how the Lord has been showing me this too and I am not married yet. I was in a situation with a person I was courting at the time and it would of been sooo easy to place blame on them and to become bitter about something that had happened between us. I flipped through Ephesians where it tells us to throw off bitterness malice and wrath and to forgive as Christ forgave us. It is easy to demand "your rights" but Christ did no such thing when he died for us.

    It is good to pray for them with the pure intention to see God's will performed in their lives. Sometimes people use prayer as a way to manipulate people too, thinking that God will do what they ask when sometimes they are asking amiss to get their own pleasures or justices fulfilled. May we boldly approach the throne of grace with a pure heart that we may receive mercy and help in our time of need and be able to extend that same mercy to others when it is due.

  3. that's awesome. I think Hadassah is also a type of The Church, the whole Bride of Christ in this season. Its time to get into fasting and prayer heavily for such a time as this.

  4. Another insightful and Holy Spirit-inspired post - how refreshing. I am looking over at my sleeping husband and daughter as I write this and thanking The Father for such a precious gift as a man with Christ as his head to lead us through life and for me to support him, revive him when times are hard share in the good things and the struggles worship God with him and have him understand me and my heart.

    Last night after many days of hard work he turned to me and thanked me for my hard work in the home, on his business and with our daughter - he really appreciated it and you know what I hadn't even noticed. When we step into the frame of God's order He will paint the most beautiful picture with our lives and bring such peace such security against the scourges of our age. We women have been plagued by fear and that has lead to dysfunction - but we must turn to Christ and realise in the husband and family put before us God has given us a wonderful model of His Kingdom. Let us all be glad and work hard for it is at hand.

    God bless you all families.

  5. A timely post for me as well. I am unmarried. However, God is preparing me for being a godly wife. He is showing me the importance of respecting men. I'm also learning that when my husband does arrive, I will be laying down my life completely. It's been hard to imagine giving up my career. I've worked so very hard for it. However, my husband is a type of Christ and I am literally his bride. When I came to Christ, I had to surrender all. When I'm joined to my husband, I will be surrendering all again.
    God is also working on my critical nature. But ya know that is going to take some time :D
    I really hope to be a blessing to my FH and learning the proper way to relate to men in general is a start.

  6. I greatly appreciate your blog. I see the wisdom of God in what I am reading.

  7. God bless you all, you girls are great, hope you have or find a guy who is as worthy and precious as yourself. There is like a secret hidden honor\gem in the heart of a true woman\girl. And I'm sad to see that it might be overlooked or not even noticed by some men\guys. Just wanted you to hear it being said from a guy, even though I'm just a young boy, hope that it won't be considered without weight because of it. And even if there is not a guy that loves you wholly and fully as I deem right, and has the eyesight too see the soft hidden things of the heart, rest assured our God sees all things. Well, I could say an endless lot, but it would probably just be like fat on butter and unnecessary.

    I can tell you that my mother(divorced) once told me on the phone that she would not want to submit to a man, and then she started telling me that she was worried I would have the opposite problem, too easy to "submit" or something to a girl if I had one. It was a bit of an ironic moment. I'd do my best to be what I should be if it is in her best interest. Then I could keep her until the day and time I could give her and myself to one that is greater in love than myself, and my very source of it. Anyways I'm of the belief that if one truly loves each other with complete love, then that solves 100% of the problems many couples have. Meaning either man or woman wouldn't have any problem with any type of role in that perfect love. All else just ceases to matter.

    Hope my words aren't misunderstood...<"DISCLAIMER" ^^

    It's almost as if I where to become a caretaker for God, and a vehicle for his love to come too you(her)

    Here I am thinking, and think I see a need in man to stop relying in his own strength and go to the source of power. And that the "MAN" that men might think they are supposed to be is a false one. (in some cases)(or many cases :1)

    Perhaps mans, at least seemingly greater power or fortitude serves as a tripstone for him. I'm sure it does, makes sense.

    Anyways, before I go on forever I'll stop here, was a bit of brainstorming there. But to make a short summarization, as far as I see it anyway: Complete Love=Kills the EGO

  8. Hi Dan,

    I agree! So many times when we "feel" wronged, we might say, "Why should I be the one to apologize? Why should I have to submit when he is not doing xyz?"

    And I just want to say, "Die! Just humble yourself and let that flesh die."

    Even if we are suffering due to no fault of our own, if it results in more pride & selfishness being killed within us, then it is a good thing. And did not Jesus tell us that we should expect and even rejoice for the opportunity to suffer for righteousness' sake (Matthew 5:10; I Peter 3:14-16, 4:14-16)? Did He in fact not do the same?

    It is only when we are so full of ourselves that we find humbling ourselves in service to others (even our spouses) to be an affront. That is not perfect love.

    This is the kicker. More women are willing to intercede and pray for their children than they are for their husbands. They sooner give up on their husbands than on their children, YET the relationship with their child is one which will bring separation. At some point, that child will go on to be a part of their own family. It is the spouse to which we have pledged to stand until death do we part.

    Yes, I agree that a misunderstanding of love and an unGodly focus on self is often the root of these problems.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

  9. More importantly, let us all, man and woman hand in hand, submit ourself to our Creator and God, as in the beginning Together. And Love each others.

    Sadly I almost feel stigmatized for being a guy and stereotyped. But hopefully you girls\woman around here can see trough some of that typical stuff associated with guys.

    I wonder could it be true that (some) girls to begin with is filled with (greater) compassion and love, but then when she seeks to find it requited in a guy, and(if) it is not(in the same amount), her love starts too cool ? Almost as if the whole outlook of the world starts going into greyscale, makes me think of all those persons who have had bad experiences in life. That would be sad.

    Anyways, I hope you all have guys or find guys who with the love and light of christ will see and requite all.

    I'm finished now, for real this time ;]
    Good bless, he's my only hope. My heart is being torn apart, I hope he comes again soon, or I might just kill myself first.

    P.s. I lol'ed when I saw you (blogg owner) lol'ed. Didn't know I'd ever see that here.

  10. Absolutely! And if we do each submit ourselves unto God, then we will likewise respect the order He has established and the critical roles we each play in it. God's order, with the woman being a help meet for the man, has indeed been God's plan from the beginning (Genesis 2:18).

    Certainly misplaced love is an issue for many a young girl. However, if a woman/girl has her heart in Christ first (where it should be), then she will not be looking for a man/boy to provide what only God can. A great message on this directed specifically for young girls is Set Apart Femininity.

    Let me also share that I love my husband because I love Jesus first. My love for my husband is merely an outgrowth of my love for Christ. Therefore, the love I have will never cool because it is not based on what my husband does or does not do, but on who Jesus is.

    God is looking for us to "kill ourselves", but not in a suicidal mindset, which is demonic. But in a self-sacrificing way of living in which it is no longer we who live, but Christ who lives within us.

    "For the love of Christ constraineth us; because we thus judge, that if one died for all, then were all dead: And that he died for all, that they which live should not henceforth live unto themselves, but unto him which died for them, and rose again." II Cor. 5:14-15

  11. I am sorry, but one more thing. When we have succeeded in dying to ourselves, Jesus would have come YOU.

    "My little children, of whom I travail in birth again until Christ be formed in you." Gal. 4:19

    I am not denying the reality of Jesus' Second Coming. I am saying that the agony of this life is in living it absent of the tangible presence and power of God around us. Living and seeing hurt, pain, turmoil, sickness, death, & sin and not having the power to do anything about it.

    However, we must not forget about the power of the resurrection. That as the old man is killed, we are given newness of life. We yearn for the return of our glorious Savior, but we must also yearn to be vessels fit for God's use in the here and now; bearing witness to His life, love, and power in a dying world.

  12. Hi there. Yes you are ofc right about all the above you said.
    Regarding the dying part I did not mean to convey that it was something of a good or purposeful thing in some manner. Its just a result of me struggling personally, and for a long time already. And I'm running out of fight for lack of a better word. And it's not like I haven't been enduring already, I've been holding on for almost the last 7 years, will be now in april I think. Killing me would be the merciful thing too do. In this readiness I would even run after taliban to preach if I could perhaps. People would think I was crazy, hehe and they would probably be right.

  13. Hi Nina,

    It is so true that God prepares us to be Godly men and women even before we are married. Preparation for marriage - should that be God's will for us - begins longs before we exchange vows as we learn to depend and trust upon the Lord first of all.

    I also just wanted to mention that you never know what God's plans are. If you read Proverbs 31, we may not call her a "career" woman, but she was certainly industrious.

    She sews, she obtains the food needed to nourish her family, she manages the household staff, she is wise about real estate, she conducts business transactions, she plants gardens, she provides care to the needy...

    The thing which stands out is that her focus revolves around taking care of her household.

    "That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2:4-5

    career: an occupation or profession, especially one requiring special training, followed as one's lifework.

    The thing with "careers" is that they often revolve around what we want or what we can look like to others, and they and can consume us. The "career" shapes our dreams, our decisions, our goals. For sure that is not a mindset commiserate with serving the Lord (married or not). A "career" should never be our "life's work" but Jesus should be.

    So don't think that what God is preparing in you now will go to waste should God bring you a husband. Everything God is doing in us is purposed to allow us to produce more fruit unto righteousness and that is true of our education and personal/professional life experiences.

    God Bless!

  14. Hi Bro. Dan,

    Not too long ago, God gave me a dream about a spirit of death being released into the world, so I take such comments very seriously. It is not by consequence that so many are considering taking their own lives.

    I cannot help but think of Elijah, who was feeling heavy, alone, and persecuted and he asked God to take his life.

    "But he himself went a day's journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a juniper tree: and he requested for himself that he might die; and said, It is enough; now, O LORD, take away my life; for I am not better than my fathers." I King 19:4

    The wilderness experience can seem lonely, endless even. Yet, it is killing off in us that self-life which is an obstacle to doing God's work.

    So I understand the sentiment, but the answer (as hard as it may sound) is to move beyond how you feel and seek God about what He has for you to do. It is very hard to focus on our own struggles when we are pouring out to help others. We also will find our own deliverance as we seek to be a deliverer for others.

    I know it may sound callous, but I am sincerely telling you the truth brother. Satan's only weapon against man is to keep him focused on himself. When you find yourself being oppressed, pressured, struggling, take that energy and focus it against the one enemy you have: Satan. The more pressurized you feel, the more you have to come against the kingdom of darkness - in prayer, in speaking the truth, in witnessing to the lost... THERE you will find relief and release in God.

    God knows all and if He believed that your life had served its purpose, then you would indeed be gone. Each day you live is a testimony to the fact that God is not through with you yet.

    God did not take Elijah's life. He nourished Elisha, demonstrated His presence before Him, and sent Elijah to do His will.

    I don't know your struggles, but God does and He is planning to use those so that you can be made strong and bring deliverance to those who need it.

    Praying for your strength and for God to remove any blinders to seeing His will in your life, even at this moment.

  15. Hi again. Just wanted to come back and say thanks, again there are a lot of things that could be said but(way too much infact), it feels like it probably won't be necessary, as if we can know the things possible to be said beforehand, at least there is nothing I can say in regards to the truth, besides it being true. And I know it wasn't callous anything you said.
    Lets just say that if this is a battle, then I guess I might be loosing, unless there is a miracle waiting for me that I don't know about. I'm a bit reserved about saying this since it might sound totally pathetic, but I'm not even that much worried about it anymore, just as long as I'll get to rest. In other words, not a guy that anyone can truly help, short of a miracle.

    And thanks for your prayers, I'm honored you took the time for that. It was comforting to know.

    I omitted to mention earlier that I've read many articles of yours, inc the one you mentioned in one of the above comments. Many of whom have been enriching and reminders. Keep going strong, if I may say so.

  16. As as woman as well, this has been a real examining point for me over the years, as I too have asked God to root out of me bitterness, anger,fear and mistrust of men because of past experiences. I REFUSE to let these feelings hinder my future relationship if one will exist. It's a long road for a woman to admit these things, but we struggle with the sin nature daily and must crucify it, and this is one of those areas.

    While I think this is the method all Christians should take when it comes to those around them, prayer, and asking God to deal with YOU FIRST before he deals with someone else is VITAL. When God says take the log out of your own eye before you deal with the speck in someone else, he means it.

    I do believe as in the nature of things men have to take a leading role in this, you HIT IT ON THE HEAD that women have a personal responsibility toward "working" out our own salvation as well, and there is NO EXCUSE for a godly woman to act as a worldly woman and continue to hold on to attitudes of the flesh without confession and repentance.

    No one has a perfect handle on what being a godly woman/man so please be encouraged. Use an article like this to examine yourself to the scriptures... is your life exhibiting the love of God and your neighbor? Are you exhibiting the fruits of the Spirit? Are you growing in grace?

    That is all I can do on the daily basis. I don't expect perfection from my future husband if he even exists, but I do expect perfecting... but it starts with ME.

    God bless you sister, and may the Lord bless you and keep you.

  17. Hi Set Free Indeed,

    "I don't expect perfection from my future husband if he even exists, but I do expect perfecting... but it starts with ME."

    You have said a mouthful! Regardless of what goes on with any other, I want to be able to stand before the Lord and hear Him say, "Well done good and faithful servant." How is it after our Savior has shed His blood that we would find ourselves back at the Garden of Eden, blaming someone else for why we have not heeded God's will? Let it not be so!

    I'll tell you something else too. God has given me the same command about those other than my husband. If I get a thought or have a mind to criticize someone else, God will immediately ask me, "Have you prayed for that person?" And many times, I had not. My first thought is just to complain. God has told me I have no right to complain/criticize if I have not interceded for that person.

    Once I had a boss who was so hard to deal with, yet God would not listen to my gripes. He told me that my boss needed Jesus and the reason I complained is because I was only worried about myself and my hardships. However, I should have had a heart to intercede for that woman so that she could be set free.

    This is surely an area where God still works on me...daily! LOL But first, He had to deal with the fact that I didn't have a desire to be what He had designed me to be. It was not until I could admit this to the Lord that He could begin to change my heart.

    As I read through Proverbs 31 the other day, it hit me how selfless her actions were. This is where I need help; not thinking of myself first but truly having the heart of an intercessor to see the needs of others and take them to the Lord.

    As you say, I want to be continually perfected by Jesus. I am far from perfect, but I can also see where He has brought me from. God willing, may His work continue for He is faithful to complete it.

    Much love Sis and pray that you are prospering in Him! :-)

  18. As long as radical, second and third-wave feminism continues to be the primary ideology our young women are exposed to, there is no hope for a mass conversion back to God. When the U. S. Supreme Court banned prayer in our public schools they left an enormous void in our children's world. It has been replaced with humanism, socialism, but most importantly, by the egocentric, self-centered, pushy, sexually explicit face of radical feminism. Christian men must begin to FIGHT BACK and help women to understand the inherent evil of adopting a feminist lifestyle, based on "career." The truth is, women were not designed by God to be leaders of men! It always turns out badly, no matter what the circumstances are, whether within the home or without.

    1. Hi K.Q.Duane,

      You are right there. One must part with the lies of feminism to walk with God. I am praying for a revival, as the lies of Satan become apparent to all (just look at the inheritance left to our children under this mess - Isaiah 3:12) there are those who will turn to God with their whole hearts and leave all deceptions behind. May we be ready and filled with God's Spirit to point the way as they begin to seek deliverance.

      God Bless!


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